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Pondering!

 

Pondering!


~~Pondering!~~
Is it too much to expect something out of unexpected?
Is it too much a frill on my list?
I have been feeling a bit unorchestrated,
Maybe I have lost a will to live!
..
I have been scared to the bones,
Even thoughts of it
bring back those chills!
Filled with remorse for the cradles left untouched,
How can regrets stay calm in the heat!
..
I've been pulling the all-nighters,
My eyes are heavy
And so are my legs feel way-too weak!
Mere thoughts just crushes my soul,
Deprives me of my beliefs!
..
Trust no process,
That's how I have been.
I'm scared to say the 'L-word'.
I don't know if it's for myself or is there someone really in heed!
..
I'm scared,
In disbelief.
Seeing myself
Through your eyes,
Stuck in this time loop
Trapped in the dark!
..
Confining the magic,
Reflecting the shimmer of confetti.
Makes me question myself:
Every time, Everyday
Even in this nick of time:
Is this where I'm supposed to be at all?
Or, is there something worthy, I have already lost?
..
Disparage Myself-
Would that be enough?
Or is there even something else
I'm missing?
Following the trails,
Being braver than what I had been!
..
What I had; is lost for once and all!
What left untouched is the set of open questions
For me to allure.
Seems like,
My best thing has already been taken back.
And all that is left
Are these hollow walls!
..
It's funny;
It really is!
Feels like,
I always had something to lose
Before today!
Now, none, nothing at all!
..
The only thing that makes me wonder:
Is this where I'm supposed to be at all?
..
I'm betting on it:
Against the odds.
All at once,
for me and the pieces of the soul
Left to allure!
- क्रेवेंली_Kafir✍️✌️
(" न सम्मान का मोह, न अपमान का भय।")

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